Topics of the day:

1. ethnic sexist
2. You Know a book is good if... (fwd)

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Date: Fri, 7 Apr 1995 13:49:40 -0600
From: John/Mary Ellen McWilliams <jmcwilli@RAMBO.SC.WHECN.EDU>
Subject: ethnic sexist

A Polish girl was competing in a swimming meet with a Russian and a
Hungarian girl. The announcer called the race; the girls dived into the water,
the Russian and Hungarian girls swimming mightily down their lanes. The Polish
girl just bobbed up and down in the water. By the time the other girls had
finished their laps, the Polish girl had barely bobbed her way across the
pool. Her coach rushed up and yelled, "What's the matter with you? Why
didn't you swim?!!"

With tears streaming down her face, the Polish girl sobbed, "Those other girls
cheated! The announcer said we were going to swim the breast stroke, and they
used their arms!"

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Date: Fri, 7 Apr 1995 16:36:00 EST
From: "Wall, David K." <DKW0@NIOSHE2.EM.CDC.GOV>
Subject: You Know a book is good if... (fwd)

I saw this in rec.arts.books, and thought it was funny enough to forward
on...
Even the .sig is good.

But first, an announcement: I've set up a small WWW page containing some
of the more commonly repeated jokes, like "Bedroom Golf", "Men and Women
as Chemicals", "You might be a redneck if...", or the dreaded
"Administratium".
It's at http://iac.net/~darkon/humor.html. Of course, there are many other
humor
archives out there, too, most bigger and better than mine (sniff). Yahoo
has
a list of some of them at
http://www.yahoo.com/Entertainment/Humor__Jokes__and_Fun/.

David

--------------- forwarded post ----------------
Newsgroups: rec.arts.books
From: lsc@netcom.com (Lisa Chabot)
Subject: Re: You Know a book is good if...
Summary: Bad Book, Bad!
Keywords: put that cover blurb down, you don't know where it's been
Organization: VMl
Date: Sat, 1 Apr 1995 02:15:25 GMT

Good books are the ones that stay on the shelves quietly, and do not
follow you into the bedroom or stowaway in your briefcase. Good books
let you get plenty of sleep at night and do not interfere with your
nutrition. Good books do not tug on your sleeve when you are out
with your friends, trying to get your attention, making you wish you
were somewhere else. Good books do not leave you for your friends,
staying out for who knows how long, coming home creased, with
somebody else's crumbs in their fashionably colored dust jacket, or
dribbling pages; and they always come home. Good books are never
sent from home. Good books do not bite. Good books do not shed
ideas that you're always having to pick up and do something about.
Good books do not make bad smells, good books do not alarm the neighbors.
Good books are eager to please, now.

------
"That's what I love about the movies. There's always
some
minor character standing around to tell you the moral, just
in
case you're too dumb to figure it out for yourself."

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End of HUMOR Digest - 7 Apr 1995
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